Green Soylent and Pink Goo

The other day I was told by a friend of mine "you let your kid eat Chicken Nuggets at McDonalds? Do you know what they are made of? Amonia!" This is old stuff, but really, it's never too late to snicker at people. Let me show you a picture:

What a chicken nugget is made of. Maybe.

Surely, it can't be good to eat suspicious pink thing made of unidentifiable chicken bits, right? Sorry, I have no better way to say it, but, that's stupid. What that is, is a way to get every little bit of protein out of a dead chicken. And that is good. Because if we are going to kill a chicken, the least we can do is eat all of it. And this thing does such a good job even fussy five year olds like eating the unidentifiable chicken bits.

This is both ecologically sound and economically wise, but smart. If native americans did this, we would forever show it as an example of their moral superiority back when we had not killed them with chickenpox, along with their crafty woodcarving.

So, with that out of the way, let's look at another picture:

What Soylent Green will be made of.

If I lived in that future, and was told "Soylent Green is made of people! people!" ( Should I have used a spoiler alert for a movie released when I was 2? In 1973?), I would say "cool, that guy always had good taste". In the movie, it's not like someone is kidnapping guys and feeding them to the soylentizer. It's a voluntary affair. People say "I'm old, this life sucks, make me into green food". Then, he's euthanized and, later, processed and eaten. That's not shocking, that is logical.

If I ever die (which I intend not to), you are all authorized to turn me into pink goo, dye me green, and turn me into special St Patrick's day chicken McNuggets.

Bon appetit.


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